Some workplace questions arrive with a weight that stops you in your tracks. This one, sent in anonymously, is exactly that kind of question: a 33-year-old woman on a visa sponsorship whose boss asked her, in front of colleagues, when she planned to have children and whether she had frozen her eggs.

This question was answered by Aimee Davies, Mental Health Expert, whose practice centres on workplace wellbeing and navigating situations of harm and power; Nick Hunter, Industry Leader and Business Owner, who brought a frank perspective on how he would want this kind of behaviour raised in his own organisation; and Andy Wright, host of Asking For A Friend on Never Not Creative, who highlighted the practical legal resources available to people in exactly this situation.

What happened here is not okay

Aimee was clear from the outset: questions about reproductive choices, fertility, and personal life are inappropriate in any workplace, and doing so in front of colleagues compounds the harm. The visa sponsorship layer makes it genuinely complex, because the usual calculus of "just push back" does not apply when your right to remain in the country is tied to your employer.

You do not have to respond perfectly in the moment

Aimee offered several calm, measured responses that create a boundary without escalating: phrases like "I don't discuss personal reproductive decisions at work" or "I'd prefer to keep our conversations work related." Nick added that simply asking the person to repeat what they said can prompt a moment of self-awareness that words alone sometimes cannot.

Document everything and seek confidential advice

Aimee was emphatic about the importance of noting dates, comments, witnesses, and the impact the behaviour has had. From there, confidential advice is available through HR, Fair Work, a union, or an immigration professional who understands the specific complexities of visa sponsorship. Andy also pointed to the Never Not Creative free legal advice line as an immediate first step for understanding your rights.

Look after yourself first

Before any of the formal steps, Aimee reminded the person asking that processing what happened, talking to someone trusted, and giving themselves time and care is not a small thing. It matters.

If this resonates with your situation, know that you have more options than it might feel like right now.